You might have noticed my absence the past few weeks. I’m here to talk about why. This will be a short one. It was an unplanned and unwelcomed hiatus. I’ve been an emotional wreck lately because just like the last time I went on a hiatus, Adrien and I lost another baby. 6 weeks into the pregnancy, few days before we go to our first ultrasound appointment, I had a miscarriage. It happened so fast, 15 minutes, and it’s gone. Going through the pain and heartache the second time doesn’t make things easier to accept. Actually, it hurts more. I must admit that I was scared, yet hopeful, too, the moment we found out I was pregnant. I was afraid of going through the same ordeal as before. I’ve been extra careful this time. Only, it was not meant to be. Again. It was devastating. Until now, I cry over petty things and even having trouble controlling my emotions. Being prodded by needles constantly doesn’t help at all. I feel physically and emotionally drained for the past couple of weeks.
As always, both our families had been very supportive in this trying time and we couldn’t be thankful enough. I’ve decided to share what I’ve been through again because it helped a lot the first time. I get to talk about it without any judgment and I get to not only share my experience but to have others share their own stories as well. It was very heartwarming and uplifting to read all the kinds words and support you guys have shown me. I really appreciate it and I thank you all for that.
In two days, Adrien and I will be flying to the Philippines for a two months vacation. He actually booked the flight to cheer us up on the first miscarriage. Who would have thought that the actual trip will be to cheer us up again? Of course, I am beyond excited. Still, the sadness lingers. I know now that it will never ever leave and I am okay with it. Because I also know not to let the sadness consume me.
With that, I want to thank you for taking the time to read. I won’t be active that much in blogging for the next couple of months and I hope you’ll still be here when I get back.
Hope you all have a great day! Till next time!